Welcome to Skottustelpa's page of fun and games. Skottustelpa is amazing, beautiful and incredibly talented. Everyone loves Skottustelpa. Go, Skottustelpa, go!
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| Skottustelpa, The Continuing Saga Welcome to Skottustelpa's page of fun and games. Skottustelpa is amazing, beautiful and incredibly talented. Everyone loves Skottustelpa. Go, Skottustelpa, go! |
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Sunday, April 24, 2005 I want you to check this out. I got this link from Halli, so Halli, if you are reading it, and everybody that reads Halli, don't have to check it out. The rest of you check it out. Welcome to the world of David Firth. Hypnotoad is to check out the Valentine's Day Special, the rest of you stay away unless you can't resist gore. posted by Skotta | 8:44 AM | Friday, April 22, 2005 Days to Cannes : 12 I have fancy French looking earrings for the trip. That is about all I will be wearing in the heat. Oh, and a bikini. The Icelandic feminist side of me is having a weird feeling about one thing. I have a VIP pass. Don't have a problem with that. My pass will have a title and my title in the film world is: Spouse of Amazing Boyfriend. Could they not just put the name of the firm on the card? It's not really a problem, more like a pebble in ones shoe. You can live with it but you really feel like taking your shoe off and shaking the shoe. I have just not been raised in a society that taught that there was prestige in being a Spouse. "The Wife", like in some other countries, has not been a really honorable title unless in certain groups of snobs. The rest of my countrymen kinda don't give a shit whom you are married to. They might want to know who your dad is though ... before they give you a job. There is a paradox in this. Having connections is vital in Iceland. You don't go out and buy a used car before having someone who knows about cars help you. It is generally a good thing to have a friend who is a doctor or a nurse, or a familimember that is a lawyer. It is considered good to know someone working in the bank (or it used to before they started lending money to everybody) and essential to know someone who knows about computers. Quite often, jobs come through connections too (but that is not purely Icelandic). It is good to know somebodys spouse if that spouse has a profession or a skill that comes in handy. So unless you are into swinging, being solely a spouse is of no relevance whatsoever. I am slowly getting used to being introduced at every gathering as "My Girlfriend". People nod and smile and give me their hand and then turn embarrasingly away. They other spouses (male or female) smile quietly at each other with that "oh, you are a spouse too" smile. Still, every time I am introduced like that I feel like shouting I am interesting! I have a very exciting life and I do remarkable things! (This tells a tale of a Skotta that has a lot less need to be important when not at these gatherings. Good or bad, you be the judge. Just don't mix up the need to be inportant with ambition). The need is not intense, I know these gatherings are not there for the sake of meeting interesting people, it is business. It is for the right handshakes with the right people, the connections with the ones you like and want to work with in the future. And of course for the "job well done" feeling. I go there for the free movie and the popcorn and am willing to smile and be cute for an half an hour afterwards (with free drinks and the occational royal sighting) while AB introduces me as his object of adoration (translates:girlfriend). I like cuddling at the movies with my man, surrounded with celebrities or not, and he almost never takes me unless there is an opening he wants to attend. It also gives me a reason for a great warderobe ... Everyone else on the team going to the Cannes Film Festival has a job title called Visual Effects something or other, or Editor or Producer or something or other. I have the job title Spouse of the Boss Man. Not that it isn't important work ... posted by Skotta | 12:13 PM | Hey, I just added a link! Check out World Clock for the easy way to find out what the time is around the world. I love this. It means I always know when my friends are asleep in America, or awake to receive phone calls ... I am at home, being lazy. It is Big Prayer Day in Denmark so I have the day off. Not praying though. Story of the day is that once upon a time people believed in all these saints and each one of them had to be prayed to. People would get half a day off to pray to their saint. This was very bothersome for the nations employers so the smart king decided to make one Big Prayer Day where people could stay home and pray. I will bathe and fantasize about washing my windows. And receive a visitor from Iceland. Yay! posted by Skotta | 11:52 AM | Wednesday, April 13, 2005 Mother ... is the woman that says "your cold is better" when you had forgotten you had one. My mother is 73 years old. She is as current in her childrens affairs as if they were 15. You know, when you think you are keeping things private, but she kinda knows. My mother has the life experience of a whole country. This is a great source of strength if you know how to use it. I call upon it weekly, twice a week if I really want to lux things. I will not see my family for a year now as I don't expect going "home" until next New Yrs. Even though I have gone without a visit for a year many times before, it feels like a long time now. You see, I got to visit Iceland 4 times last year. And now I'll tell you a secret. Well, not anymore. My AB is going to buy an old jeep to keep in Iceland so that we have a ride when we are there. How cool is that? So if I let you know when we have bought the jeep, you let me know when you are travelling to Iceland and we'll fly home and drive you to the mountains. Sounds good. posted by Skotta | 8:00 PM | So, Britney is now officially prego. The link in the Morgunbladid made me check her page. I have done this before and I have to say that I don't like her new look ... My favorite though is the bubble called "Love B" (or Stream of Consciousness). This is where Britney writes open letters to the tabloids and Britney's mother checks in. The mom tells she really misses being in touch with all of us. Well, maybe not all of us as the letter is adressed to Britney's fans. In "Love B" there is also a section called Truth Be Told where Britney fights off rumors on hostility between her and Christina, and sibling rivalry (as the kid sis is now getting more attention than before). Read her if you can. The woman is not exactly a rocket scientist. 
posted by Skotta |
3:07 PM
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Tuesday, April 12, 2005 Summer is here. Okay, not summer, but spring. Danish spring is kinda like Icelandic summer. I have been gathering some goodies for my summer wardrobe and now have stuff to wear for work and play this summer. I have a little bit more money than usually so I have enjoyed splurging a little. In stead of waiting for the sales and then weeping over the fact that they don't have my size, I have now just gone out and bought my size while it is still in stock although it is fully priced. This is a splurge because I usually try to use very little money on my summer wardrobe, simply because it doesn't last that long. Summer clothing have been a dilema for me. I don't know how to magnage a summer wardrobe because I never grew up with "summer". I grew up with a winter and than a long fall. Then winter again. Summer meant only the wool sweaters in stead of wool sweaters under artic clothing. Here are some of the pit holes one falls into the first few "summers" in ones life: Transparent clothing. Summer clothes are see-through. This causes numerous problems. You buy a skirt. Then you realize everyone can see your panties. All of a sudden all your black underwear is useless. Then you buy new panties. Then you are told (by the nice lady at work who is appalled) that you should probably be wearing bigger panties under your see-through skirt ... Lessons learned: a) Summer requires white underwear. b) Summer skirts should be checked for transparency befor purchase. Actually, tops too unless you are keen on showing off your bra (or your boobs). c) Do not show your thong at work unless you're a stripper. Colors. Black is not going to make you happy in the burning sun unless you are a hard core Goth. You need to have special clothing for summer evenings. Shawls and/or cardigans. Never had those before. I get by with track suit jumpers though. During the day, you need to have long sleeved tops to prevent from burning. Tank tops only get you to the point of burns measured in degrees. Tried that. (Oh, and then you learn details, like that a tank top isn't just body with straps, but a garmet which can make you look really weird if the straps are not wide enough apart or too close etc.) Beach wear. I have learned that one has to be fully equipped for the beach. Althoug declaring that a bathing suit was not my favorite piece of cloting, and that I would not wear a bikini ever ... nor sun bathe topless at the beach ... I was quick to realize that my Victorian corset torture-of-a-bathing-suit in dark blue was going to kill me at the beach. It was remarkably easy to strip down to the bikini briefs. Such is life in Europe. I can't really explain, but there is this certain type of beach clothing that are the most comfortable to wear unless you are on a private beach. The kind you can dress and undress underneath. Change your panties and such. You need to have flip flops at the beach as all other shoes get sand stuck in them and the sand is too warm to go barefoot. This you learn by first going barefoot, then with the wrong type of sandals on (using most of the day trying to get the sand out of your shoes).  There are such things as summer shoes. You can't wear the fancy sandals at work when you are in my line of business. You end up learing, after ruining a few pairs of flip flops (that you also learn hurt your toes), that the ugly Ecco sandals are the shit even though you look like a retard in them.  Don't ever get the cheap one with the cork inlay, they will go rock hard after a run in the rain. You need to have a pack of band aids on you through summer for blisters on feet. In Iceland, sneeks are summer shoes. In Denmark, if you wear sneaks all summer they get ruined because they are going to stink and your feet are going to rot in them. In the US you have the whole pedicure halloy to deal with on top of the rest. If you do choose to go for the closed shoe there is a whole new brand of socks you wear. Those are tiny and don't last very long. The trickiest part of the summer wardrobe is the finer stuff. Like, you get invited out to eat real fancy like, and you all of a sudden need to have the closed-toe-slip-ons and or high heeled sandals. And the not leaf-thin-but-still-summer-clothing stuff. I usually fuck it up, wear either too much or too little, and end up going through summer with a runny nose. Generally, summer clothing don't last very long. Summer shoes only last about two summers (unless you get caught in the rain quite often or work with kids that play with water during summer, then they last 1 1/2 months). It's a drag. Don't have favorites because chances are they might die on you after the summer. Summer clothing don't survive laundry and they get holes in them quite quickly. A linen top can easily get holes under the arms. Never ever had a garmet that got holes under the arms before. All of a sudden have a lot of formerly fancy summer stuff to paint in and clean house in. There is more but I think you get my drift. Funny how our practical knowledge is defined by weather. Movies have been made about this. It's the "Duh, of course you don't wear this at work during the summer" element. Or as I blogged about once a long time about, the "Are you crazy! Nobody in their right mind would leave the house in this heat! We'll go to K-mart and buy a fan after 5 pm" element. I find it complicated. Winter is much easier. Throw on a pair of jeans and a sweater, and some wool if it is really cold. Apply the wool all over the body and you are good to go.  See?! Warm! posted by Skotta | 8:04 PM | Sunday, April 10, 2005 I have been told my date is still on ... just postponed a little. Hmmm. I keep waiting for a blog from The Queen regarding the Royal wedding. I was hoping she would blog about it. But no, her last post is on Sin City. I can't wait to see that movie as three of the Bloggers I read have loved it. While I wait for my date to show up I am killing time with the NEXT BLOG button. You should be careful with that. I have had to close my browser twice because of pop up windows. Some of the blogs are advertisements or sites promoting penis enlargements and prostitution. That's what you get when you play random. Let me tell you what is much more fun. Natalie Dee is much more fun. I have now washed and dryed the complete wardrobe of two adults, linen and towels. 5 machines. I have not folded one thing. Our sofa has a mountain of very clean, very wrinkled clothes, linen and towels. Feat of the day: I did the dishes. No, I did not dry them. posted by Skotta | 2:01 PM | Hung out with my girl R and her baby boy yesterday. Shopping downtown. I go myself a salat spinner, a thingy one does not see in Denmark too often. I have been looking for one for a while now, so desperate for one that I consideret buying one in Target when I was in the US in February. I could not explain the usefulness of the thing to my not-so-thrilled-with-salat-more-of-a-steak-kinda-guy Amazing Boyfriend. I saw one in some kind of a hipster thingy boutique on Istegade and grabbed it. Yay! For those who don't know it, here is an Amazon intro to the Salat Spinner. Salat will be eaten at my place from now on. We ended up in a candy store that means business with 500 types of candy to choose from. We lost ourselves, taking turns in shopping candy while the other one took care of the boy. I have to say, he is the most patient little thing I have ever met. Pizza and a movie was in order after the day shopping. No salat. They baby was really happy playing with my shaker (that because of the hipster factor has very joyful colors). I have to tell you about this baby. He is learing how to walk. Not really news if not for the fact that he can already charge his mothers telephone. The mini crawls to the charger and fits the little stick into the phone. I love him. AB joined us for the pizza and required a girlie movie after dinner so he could zone of and take a nap while we watched. So we went out for a girlie movie. Made the mistake of taking Connie and Carla. We fell for the "good actors" bluff. This time Nina Vardos and Toni Colette. It was soooo bad. Being tough (or hopelessly optimistic), we stayed with it although we knew right from the start that it was a bad movie. Second time I do this in the same week! Horrid script, just like Unconditional Love, but this time also with some very bad acting. Let me tell you the plot. Connie and Carla witness a murder and accidently end up with a kilo of coke. They go to LA and become transvestites to hide. Things are going great until the evil man finds them. Side story: A transvestite bartender reconciliates with his brother. One of the girls falls in love with the brother (who is played by David Duchovny) which now causes some complications as he only knows her as a man. Script has great potential (at least a greater potential than the Unconditional Homo/Dwarf/Diworsee Middle Aged Woman script). The side story could have been good if it had been worked differently. Lacks depth and better written lines. I can't understand how an actress can do Muriels Wedding and then end up as this. Is that the directors fault? And like with the other bad movie I saw this week, there is music to the whole thing. You see, Connie and Carla love performing in drag. I am guessing the numbers they perform (from musicals like Oklahoma and Jesus Christ Superstar) are picked because of the "deep" meaning in the lyrics. I have to say that no gay man I have ever known (I used to dress men in drag before they performed at 22, the only gay bar in Reykjavik in my youth) would have picked these songs to perfom. The transvestite performers I have known have had better taste in music (no offence to Oklahoma and Jesus Christ Superstar that definetly counts as great music history) and would never have killed their audience with Connie and Carla's repertoire. I don't know a single gay man that is a Barbara Streisand fan or would have gotten the Yentl refferals in the movie. I happen to know more gay men than your average straight girl does. Mind you, most of my gay friends have not reached 40 yet. After movies like Pricilla and TV shows of the Will and Grace caliber (not that there is much else than generalisations in Will and Grace), Connie and Carla just make me sad. This is a hopelessly stupid movie. Not funny stupid, just stupid stupid. Please don't see it. It's a bad, bad, movie. Bad movie. I had to rise and leave the room because I couldn't deal with the ending. It was so bad that it made my AB ask me if we shouldn't start writing scripts. And then he went to work. I knew this time would come. It is the sleeping-at-work time. 
posted by Skotta |
10:19 AM
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Thursday, April 07, 2005 Wella, wella. some work related thoughts ... I took my current job thinking: "This will be a good job for me to have until I get into university. Little chance I will take this work to heart." And I'm not taking it to heart. But I am still doing it. I love to take jobs at places where things are a mess and then, like the happy camper I am, clean up and leave the place in a better state then I came to it. This is one of the things I am really good at because I am not afraid of change, have great problem solving skills, have magic motivational skills, and always get great results that my clients can thrive and develope in. I have happy clients. I am doing that now. I have suggested changes that the management loved and went for, causing two departments to merge. I am going to be using the next four months making sure the merge will be successful. Then I will quit. I am sure I would make a lot of money if my clients were not kids. I love working with kids. I am passionate about everything that has to do with development and it is such a grace to be able to take part in the development of a human being. I find kids the most fantastic things on earth. I love working with kids because of their honesty. Or at least you can easily see through them if they are pulling a stunt. Generally, you can say that if you treat kids honestly, they respond honestly. Adults don't. Adults are always playing games, they alwasy have a motive. Kids motives are honest and clear. I am hungry. I am tired. I am angry. I am happy. I am insulted. I want attention. I need help. I want to decide (in my favor). Adults have generally have the same motives but they are so often ashamed of them that they start playing games to get their needs met. This is bothersome and tireing. The only downside of my job is unfortunately the parents. I have 22 amazing parents to work with and 2 psycho parents. Funny enough, those two psycho parents can just make me hate my job. And after one more phone call from a psycho parent that should just get a life, I was really, really tired of my job today. posted by Skotta | 8:23 PM | Tuesday, April 05, 2005 Did not do the dishes today. Did not attend to laundry. Did not wash floors. Did buy toilet paper. Did eat great sushi with one of my sweetest friends and hang out. Did start day count to amazing vacation in Cannes. Days to Cannes: 29. I'm off to bed. posted by Skotta | 9:35 PM | Monday, April 04, 2005 Three down, two to go When Harry met Sally is everything Unconditional Love wanted to be but failed. I roared. Really charming and funny, great script. Probably the only good role Billy Crystal ever got, apart from Jodie in Soap. Normally I can't stand the guy. One of my favorite parts of the movie goes like this: Harry: So how come you broke up with Sheldon? Sally: How do you know we broke up? Harry: Because if you didn't break up, you wouldn't be with me, you'd be off with Sheldon the Wonder Schlong. Sally: First of all, I am not with you. And second of all, it is none of your business why we broke up. Harry: You're right, you're right. I don't want to know. Sally: Well, if you must know, it was because he was very jealous and I had these Days of the Week underpants. Harry: (He makes a loud buzzer sound) I'm sorry. I need a judge's ruling on this. Days of the Week underpants? Sally: Yes. They had the days of the week on them, and I thought they were sort of funny - and then one day, Sheldon says to me, 'You never wear Sunday.' He's all suspicious. Where was Sunday? Where had I left Sunday? And I told him, and he didn't believe me. Harry: What? Sally: They don't make Sunday. Harry: Why not? Sally: (matter-of-factly) Because of God. Definetly a must see, even though you saw it back then ... go see it again. And then I watched Ali G Innit Sketches from the The 11 O'Clock Show where Sacha Baron Cohen (as Ali G) interwiews prominent Brits on topics from opera and politics to reiki and Chinese medicine. Genious. Time well spent if you need to turn off your brain for a while. Well, I'm off to work again. posted by Skotta | 3:10 PM | Sunday, April 03, 2005 5 Favorites for 5 Days AB's off to save the arse of Femina's marketing department so that they can get more readers. Don't ask. Couldn't get a movie date on such short notice myself so I decided that the eve would be spent with my most favorite person: Moi. And sushi and Blockbuster. Rememberred that one doesn't eat sushi on Sundays as I glided past all the open sushi places on my way to Selfish that of course was closed. For those who don't know, sushi is not to be eaten on Sundays because one does not get fresh fish on Sundays. So, now you know, your Sunday night sushi is at least a day old. You're welcome. Dropped by Kazims Kitchen for some pakoras before planting myself in front of the computer: DVD #1: Unconditional Love. What can I say? This is the turnout when bad movies happen to good people. It has it's moments. Very short, very few moments. And the other moments got me allmost turning the garbage off. And I LOVE gay men, dwarfs, and Julie Andrews! By the makers of Muriel's Wedding and Four Weddings and a Funeral, this movie has a great cast but never gets you charmed the way the others did. I can't really put my finger on what is missing, but I am guessing a good script. The amazing cast did what they could but it was not to be saved. It is just bad. Please don't see it. Unless your life can't go on without seeing a film about an American Houswife, a gay Brit, and an American woman dwarf, catch a serial killer. And have the signature sing along at the end of course. DVD #2: When Harry met Sally. Need to see if it is as good as I remember. I'll keep you posted. posted by Skotta | 9:46 PM | Friday, April 01, 2005 Okay, okay, I don't have a broken heart! Had drama. Lets just say that my Amazing Boyfriend has found out that we handle anger differently ... Okay, need to give a shout out to my friend who showed me her apartment today. Man, the women I know just rock! This one took a crowbar to her kitchen ... hehehe. The place is in pieces but it looks fantastic. Her soul is alredy in the place, I could totally feel that she lived there even though she has not moved in. Funny how knocking down walls and taking a crowbar to things does that to a place. Congrats on the big feat. You will never regret this or the work it intales. posted by Skotta | 6:18 PM | |
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